One Man's Trash...Another Man's Treasure???

Is it wrong to feel like this little saying applies to dating? I firmly believe that there is someone for everyone, think about that really annoying co-worker who's husband adores her or crazy family member who has been paired up since the dawn of time. How many times have you or someone you know said "I just don't get it, why am I still single?" I have to hope it is because my dude on a white horse....or bass guitar has not come along and when he does I will not have to wonder anymore.

I take this matter into my own hands and don't wait for him to show up at my door. I know if I did that I would be waiting around forever and I really feel like if I don't meet as many men as possible, I may not appreciate him when he does come along. I'm a firm believer in knowing what I want. The only way that will happen is by personal experience.

With that being said, I....the Semi-Reformed Bad Girl....am an online dater. Ahhh, now you can see why I would liken my search to the whole "one man's trash...." The Internet seems to be the place where men go once they have split up and all friends are connected to the ex which in turn means they can't find another chick within the circle.

Here is my list of pros and cons of online dating. I do not pay for online dating sites and do not do the whole long distance thing. So my experience comes from craigslist.org...SCARY I know and plentyoffish.com (I'm stealing the whole bullet list idea from a friends blog...it looked so clean!)

Pros:

• A large pool of men in a concentrated area
• The opportunity to be completely honest about who you are and know that some people are in your same situation
• Pictures...online datings best friend
• POF has specific questions that people answer when making a profile
• Finding someone you have already had a romp in the sheets with a few years ago
• A quick way to determine if a man has what you are looking for
• Having the upper hand, it's not like you have to make up an excuse on why you don't want to talk to them if they sent you a message that was less than stellar
• Meeting someone in person and they are even better looking/more awesome than on their profile
• Great if you are a busy person

Cons:

• A large pool of women, maybe it's just me but it seems like men are always interested in the next new shiny toy. This very well could be a product of men not knowing what they want or not being prepared for what they think they want
• Dishonesty. There seems to be a disconnect where people maybe kind of make up who they are or what they have to offer since technically they don't know the person they are speaking to
• Someone who is more interesting online...This has been a rare for me but it happens
• The player...after years of doing this...I can smell him from a mile away.
• Finding someone you had a romp in the sheets with a few years ago
• The stigma attached to "online dating" even though "everyone is doing it"

Overall I like online dating, if it doesn't work out then you don't have to explain to anyone what happened or really ever see him again. If your friends set you up, the date is horrible and you happen to see him out when you are both with friends....ak-ward.

I think the biggest downside that I have found is the man who isn't being honest with himself. He has baggage that he hasn't dealt with, he is looking for a woman to replace what he had and he just isn't really ready for a relationship. Online dating gives people an easy rebound. If it weren't for online dating people would have to focus more on themselves instead of the task of finding someone new.

My tips for online dating? Fun. A fun profile with little of what you don't like and more of what you do. Something that makes you stand out..a silly picture. I find it easier to know how interested a man is by the first message. If he has read my profile and looked at the captions of my pictures, he is more likely to comment, then in turn showing me that he took the time to actually read what I had to say. Have fun. It is hard to not get your hopes up but if you look at it with an open mind and a way to experience new things and people...it can be a lot of fun. Just be you. There is no sense in making up anything. It makes it more enjoyable when you just do you.

I would be interested in others thoughts on online dating. Have you done it? Had any success? I only know of one couple who met online that are together and appear to be life partners. While my stories are sometimes good, I wonder if I will meet my mate via the Internet. I need a time machine damn it!